Author: smanuels

For this project the possible examples that I would be interested in presenting are the discourses I am currently taken apart in. I currently am taken part in multiple discourses such as the discourse of track and field, dental assisting, and retail worker.

The discourse of dental assisting it is a group of people that are fluent in the procedures and everyday task that need to be completed. They are able to multitask by being able to complete chairside, independent, surgical, reception, and lab task on a daily basis. There are multiple guidelines that need to be followed in order to actively do the task completely and successfully.

Sources for this discourse: The data that could be used is a the terms used daily, the DAMB book, radiology and ICE certification.

Initial Thoughts: I think this data makes sense because they are needed to show that you are fluent in this discourse. To work in a workplace you need to atleast be ICE and radiology certified. There also various terms that need to understood in order to complete task on a daily basis. There is also the data of actually working in the field to get the best idea of how it works.

The other idea I have is the discourse of track and field. This discourse is a group of people that enjoy running and participating in multiple field events. They are actively engaged people that can take part in more than one event in the duration of the meet. Sources for this discourse: For data the use of an article of track and field can be beneficial and a playbook of rules that are required.

Initial thoughts: The rules book for track and field can offer the rules and regulations that are needed in order to have a fluent meet. It also demonstrates the values that need to be shown in order to properly engage in the discourse. An article can show how fans and player voice their opinion on the discourse of track and field. Also can show some relationships between the player and fan.

The other idea of a discourse i am apart of would be the discourse of a retail worker. This is a group of people that work in sales with the community. They learn to socialize through different situations and promote certain products.

Sources for this discourse:  The data that could be used to support the discourse I am presenting is pieces of language from conversations through the interaction between customer and clients. The website of the store, handbook, or manual.

Initial thoughts: The use of a conversation piece will show the interaction between the two parties. Which shows how good the person is in the discourse, or how they differ with the way of the discourse. Also the handbook, website, or manual will show what the discourse offers to the person that is interested in the discourse. The manual and handbook will bring rise to the social goods being offered through this specific discourse.

Time on task: 50 mins (9:00-9:50)

collreadwrit2e

Frame: Literacy acquisition is the way someone learns to read and write. Many scholars will agree that a student’s literacy success comes from a sponsor. Such scholars are Kara Alexander, James Paul Gee, and Deborah Brandt all explain how a sponsor can affect the ways of become fluent in literacy.

Credibility/Intro Sources: Alexander demonstrates outcomes in her writings that are caused by different kinds of sponsors, as Brandt and Gee would explain as someone that is teaching. Both scholars Brandt and Gee touch on this common thought of needing someone known mostly as a sponsor or apprentice to help them enter a discourse, but Gee explains that it can’t just be taught in the classroom. In the literacy narratives that are on the Rising Cairn most explain that literacy sponsors that show a positive interaction with a students and allow literacy success more commonly in higher education rather than elementary education.
Perspective: Why is it that the nature of elementary education has many negative outcomes? Although secondary education there is less negativity that is being described?

“collreadwrit2e”

Subordinate: 

“After he was able to learn how to manage his time, he finally got the grade he wanted”. 

I am emphasizing on the fact that he did not get the grade he wanted until after he learned to manage his time effectively. The reason why is because before he did not want to put in the time to do anything. Everything to him took only half an hour at most, which clearly didn’t work out well. This sentence is complex for the reason that because it states two things how he got the changed and what the results were.

“Since shown in elementary education that there is a lack of effort shown by sponsors, it can result in a negative effect on a students education.”

In this sentence it sates an issue and its result which make it a complex sentence. I am trying to emphasize on the issue of lacking effort causes students education to have a negative effect. negative effect being the result of effort not being shown. The main issue is effort not being shown because very kid is different. so a teacher needs to know when to individualize a student to allow them to succeed.

“After Hibbard explains her teacher made a positive impact on her through being there for her one and one, not just teaching her the subjects.” 

My main point here is that the teacher made the effort to support Paige. Something that not every teacher is willing to do. They can’t just focus on getting through the lesson plans and teaching the subjects they need. They also need to make sure the student understand what they are being taught. This sentence is complex because it states my independent claim and followed with a clause.

Coordinate: 

“Larson explains that this discipline is a way of brainwashing the students into knowing the rules of writing which is helpful, but not in everyday life will you be able to use those rules.”

In this sentence I show that it is coordinate sentence by breaking the two sentences into putting the word but in between my thoughts. I am emphasizing both part equally because it is true students should not be brainwashed into all these rules that are helpful in the moment, but not long term.

“This strategy of planning helped him not only in his english class, but all other classes.”

This sentence is a complex sentence because its showing that planning can be effective in not only english but in other subjects as well. I am emphasizing on both part here that learning to be organized with have a positive effect in not just one way but many.

“In order for the student to show effort they need their trusted sponsor to show a sense of effort, so they can rely on constant help.”

This sentence has two point that I am emphasizing on. The points being that I am showing that in order for one to succeed they need to have someone they can trust so they know they can alway have help. Both points are important to show what a sponsors duties are to a student.

collreadwrit2e

 

The parapgraph below is the first paragraph of my paper. I see this more as an OR because I am adding to the ideas of Brandt, but in an alternate way than Brandt openly states.

1. In elementary education the idea that teachers aren’t showing effort to engage with their students is a common argument. Engagement with students shows that there is effort demonstrated in the classroom which can lead to a positive effect. A ways of engage that is most important with the topic of literacy success is communication. Communication is both shows in Brandt and the literacy narrative Live or Die by Paige Hibbard. Brandt states a sponsorship is shown through “any agents, local or distant, concrete or abstract, who enable support, teach, model, as well as recruit, regulate, suppress, or withhold literacy–and gain advantage by it in some way” (556), or can can express any motive of effort. In Hibbards literacy narrative she explains that her outlook on english changed when someone was there to regulate what she was doing when she says “She and I made a deal. If I needed help with my school work, she would help me or she would find someone who would help me” (Hibbard 2). Her teacher made a positive impact on her just through being there for her one and one, not just as a teacher. Beforehand in Hibbard’s elementary years she didn’t have anyone to trust she was always just told that she wasn’t good enough to be in a normal English class by being thrown into the class because of my NECAPS which I never really tried on in middle school” (Hibbard 1). There was a lack of sponsorship, or engagement being shown in her elementary years which is common because most students display a thought of discipline in earlier years which is not by any means of modeling, or teaching a student to succeed in the literacy discourse. 

 This paragraph is also considered an OR. I used this as an OR because again I am just adding another side to what Gee is already stating but just in a form of discipline. This disapline is supported by Gees thoughts. 

2. Jess Larson states in her literacy narrative The Best Teacher I Ever Did Have her negative experience in elementary education is because strict requirements. Larson explains that “English class hasn’t been easy for me until I reached high school because my teachers focused more on disciplining us middle schoolers instead of elaborating on lesson plans” (1). Gee would agree with Larson that teachers are brainwashing, or forming them to follow strict guidelines which he doesn’t agree with when he states “It is a truism that a person can know perfectly that grammar of a language and not know how to use the language”(1).Gee and Larson are both trying to drive the point that someone can understand the concepts of writing such as  grammar, sentence structure, and prewriting techniques, but not know how to use them at the same time. A lot of the time it has to relate to the fact that in elementary education free writing is limited there is usually always a strict prompt that has to be followed. Larson herself explained that her love for literacy started when she had a teacher that was less strict with the circulium and was more focused on teaching her how to use the language properly. Larson states “In her class I felt so free and unchained. The environment she provided us made it easier to get our work done; I didn’t feel confined to the rules”(3).  This way of brainwashing was over for Larson because she could trust her teacher due to the safe environment that she was in. Gee, or Larson could agree that in order to become successful in a discourse you must be passionate for something and not mush fake it by knowing guidelines. 

collreadwrit2e”

In my paper I mainly follow the idea of affirming to the scholars ideas such as Gee and Brandt. My paper is supporting and adding different context to their definition of a sponsor or apprentice. Throughout my paper my peers did agree that I showed a lot of Gee and Brandt to support my main idea and used good literacy narratives to use as data. Although my peers did rise a concern that there is not enough “I say” throughout my paper, such as summarizing to allow the reader to understand more. My main point in this paper is to prove how important apprenticeship/ sponsorship is to a student learning growth and how the lack of effort from a sponsor can effect a student forever. In order to successfully affirm the scholars I do need to add more terms from both the scholars to strengthen my paper, which was suggested from my peers. I do think that I am with the revisions from my peers driving home the point that literacy is based on a great sponsor that shows continuous amounts of effort and welcome a student to a healthy free environment.

The one thing I struggled with throughout was the introduction of the literacy narratives. I did set them up naming the article and author but not enough background with all of them to show what they were feeling, or for the reader to clearly understand what happened in that literacy narrative. I do set up the quotes I use well and do not have to much summarization, just about a sentence or two per quote. I think I need to when writing my next draft think more so as a reader and not a writer. I mean that by making sure I explain everything enough so if someone never read any of the source I’m using would understand.

As of evidence from scholarly sources I do think that I hit that one home. I do have mostly everything that I am affirming to them in my paper. I do think I could add some keywords and definitions to strengthen my paper, but nothing to drastic. As for data, or literacy narratives I do think I should search for one or two narratives that better support my idea. My third literacy narrative does really support where I’m going now that I have talked to my peers. The third paragraph is where I need to focus on for better data.

collreadwrit2e

Dear Peer Reviewer,

• Question: My issue or question I am trying to show through my paper is why is it that most literacy sponsors that show a positive interaction with a students and allow literacy success are not found until higher education? I show this question in my introduction along with ways that might support my question. I each paragraph I continue to talk about the issue, but present why that issue might be occurring. I am having an issue with my question a little bit I am not sure if it is exactly what I am trying to get at. If you have any advice after reading my paper if changing my question around a bit to make it flow better I would enjoy hearing your thoughts. 
• My Data Shows: In the literacy narratives I am reading I do find a lot of them that explain that the negative part of their literacy success comes from their early education years. It is not until high school where most kids are finding their sponsor. I do have some points that support my question but my last point is really weak and would like to find a way to fix it. If you look at the last paragraph it is very weak with information. I didn’t know how to explain that the ways of prewriting are not shown until higher education and this can cause a lot of confusion. I am also struggling with ways to relate things to scholars, if you have any advice I would like to hear about it.
• I’m Adding to the Scholarly Conversation: As I stated before I am struggling with relating my issues to scholarly text. I do have some quote within my paper, but I do not know if they are strong enough. I do try to transition using the Barclays formula in my 2nd body paragraph. I am also confused on who I should relate my issue to at the moment I find Gee and Brandt the best people to relate my issues too. The quotes that I do have within my paper are there to try and support my literacy narratives. To prove that they are right in what they are saying. If you think there is another point from either the same or different scholar I would love some suggestions.
• I’m affirming or challenging a Concept in X:  Throughout my paper I am mainly affirming my points with the ideas of scholars. As you can see in the first body paragraph I affirm that a sponsor must show engagement in order for a student to show a positive response. I use Brandt’s idea of a sponsorship to show that all sponsors are people that show engagement and care for their students. I also try to use Gee to affirm that a student can know how to read and write but that doesn’t mean they are doing it the right way in my 2nd body paragraph to relate to the idea of middle school teacher making class feel like a discipline. I am unsure if this way of affirming is effective should I be more clear or should I focus on challenging the issues more. Am I coming from the right direction here or should I be coming into my paper differently. Please give me any suggestions you have about the idea of challenging or affirming.
• collreadwrit2e

Below I put an updated paragraph from my first draft that originally didn’t follow the TRIAC guidelines. I have tried my best to form a TRIAC paragraph with one literary narrative and one scholar text. It was kind of difficult to reform my paragraph into a TRIAC paragraph but I followed the google doc outline given. I started with my topic being that the lack of engagement in elementary level classrooms causes negative feedback, then went into going into more detail by saying it was because of lack of effort and communication. I then followed this with quotes from a literacy narrative and analysis the quote. I last explained the connection between sponsorship with Brandt shows that there is more effort shown through a sponsor.

Revised paragraph:

In elementary education there is the idea that the teachers aren’t going the extra mile to engage with their students. Engagement with students shows that there is effort demonstrated in the classroom which can lead to a positive effect. The ways to engage with student is through communication. Communication is shown to have a positive effect by reading Paige Hibbard’s literacy narrative Live or Die, when she says “She and I made a deal. If I needed help with my school work, she would help me or she would find someone who would help me” (Hibbard 2). Hibbard explains that her teacher made a positive impact on her just through being there for her one and one, not just as a teacher. Beforehand in Hibbard’s elementary years she didn’t have anyone to trust she was always just told that she wasn’t good enough to be in a normal English class by being thrown into the class because of my NECAPS which I never really tried on in middle school” (Hibbard 1). No one was ever there for her one and one, so she never showed the effort. Which can affect the way she displayed her academics. Brandt agrees that a sponsor is a positive impact by stating a sponsor is any agents, local or distant, concrete or abstract, who enable support, teach, model, as well as recruit, regulate, suppress, or withhold literacy–and gain advantage by it in some way” (556). In order to allow a student to have a positive impact a literacy sponsor must support or model literacy which take the effort of engagements and communication.

collreadwrit2e

Below I have attached my revised paragraph for the Barclays formula technique. I did this by taking my 2nd body paragraph and rearranging the structure to fit this formula. I started by stating the topic I will be starting off with such as the idea of disapline in younger education. I then introduced the literacy narrative that supported my arguement and explained what it was saying. Following that I transitioned from the narrative to the idea Gee talked about how someone can know the rules of english but doesn’t mean they are fluent in it. I finally ended the paragraph with my next topic.

Barclays paragraph:

Most students view elementary level schooling as form of discipline. As Jess Larson states in her literacy narrative The Best Teacher I Ever Did Have her neagitve experience in middle school due to the strict requirements. Larson explains that “English class hasn’t been easy for me until I reached high school because my teachers focused more on disciplining us middle schoolers instead of elaborating on lesson plans” (1). Larson explains that this discipline is a way of brainwashing the students into knowing the rules of writing which is helpful, but not everyday will you be able to follow the generic writing rules. Larson explains how she was able to to change her outlook based on the freedom she received in high school by valueing creative writing and changing her writing actions. As Gee would explain that “It is a truism that a person can know perfectly that grammar of a language and not know how to use the language” (1). What Gee is explaining that even though Larson knew all of the information about the rules of literacy didn’t mean she knew how to write a good paper. The reason being because she didn’t know how to say what she felt in her writing, she would be too busy using the rules. Not realizing that she can be creative along as she is following a strict schedule to stay on track.

collreadwrit2e

Throughout the past couple weeks I have been paying more attention to my curiosity. Through the week I found I was the most curious while I was in class or in the library. I figured it was because my brain was already engaged and thinking so it made me think of non-school things; what am I eating for dinner?, Do I need to go shopping?, Plans for the weekend?, etc. Most of my questions were told to myself, but the ones I was more curious about I talked to my friends about. Especially being trapped in my room with all these snow days I had more time to run some thoughts off of my friends. While I was laying in bed listening to music, I had a habit of over thinking about personal things.Still most of my questions came from school where I asked myself the most questions in calculus and chemistry. I wondered if it was because these are more problem solving subjects, so my brain wants to figure out all of my life problems at once too.I do ask the most questions in those classes, but not out loud usually to myself in my notes then go back answer them with various resourse. I find that is how to engage more with the inforamation rather than just being told what it is.My most common question throughout the week was how can so much change through just taking a few classes?, which I mean how can someone change their life long dream just from not enjoying a few pre-recs. Also how is english so important but the least required class for most majors? For most majors they are only required to take one or tow classes of english. I learned so much from just english 122 and have used the skills I learn in all of my classes. Also I find that some of the classes that are required for our major don’t really fit into what we need to know for our future job. Also another thing I was curious about was the discourse of driving? Why is it that every state has different guidelines, laws, and fines. Why cant they all be the same? As you see I am the most curious in my classes or when I’m listening to music that is why when I need to think about things I go for a long car ride with a set playlist on my phone. I never really thought about my questions until I started to write them down.

Other questions:

Throughout the week I found I asked the most questions while being in class or in the library. While I’ m learning I find that my brain is more active. When I say active I mean that its more engaged, so it allows me to be more creative. Most of the time I would be asking questions about the class, but for some subjects it makes me think about question for other topics. These questions aren’t just about literacy or school in general. I just kept writing down question that came to mind. My main topic was though was should be really be blaming the student or the sponsor. The reason being is how can a student get the right literacy background if they aren’t exposed to the proper literacy background. Everyone has a different learning curve. So if the sponsor isn’t able to cope with the curve then they just effect it. I also am curious a lot of how a sponsor can be shown. Does  there have to be guidelines. By guidelines I mean age range, discourse, background, smart, and resposiable. Below I have attached my list that I made on my phone throughout the week. I had more questions but they got deleted. I will be sure to add more as the next couple days go by.

List:

Two questions about literacy acquisition:

0.When Alexander talks about literacy he talks about success with literacy is gained by practice. Can the literacy success be based on a discourse basis? As long as on is literacy coherent for there discourse are the “masters” or does everyone have the same requirements to be a “master”?

0.In Alexander it’s states in littler narratives they try not to discriminate, then how is that later in Brandt they heavily imply that Lopez is musfaking her way into an education.

0.If a sponsor in Brandt is described as anyone who can really just have an impact on someone to alllow them to actively engage in literacy then can that person be younger? Can just a spirit impact someone’s literacy? Can someone be there own sponsor?

0.Can we blames someone’s difficulty with literacy on the sponsor or sponsors that should be helping them?

0.Are all questions important, I feel that some people ask question to try and stay engaged.

0.How to people sit in a hallway and study with music? If your focusing on the material how are you listening to the music?

0.How is that just reading a small essay by someone can explain their whole literacy life?

0.Why is it that English is so under rated but is the most important.

0.I’m always the most curious in chemistry and math, is it because you have to process more and it’s more problem solving so it reminds me of all my problems.

0.Whenever I read something I always asked a question about the reading, or relate in a way.

0.As I was at the Super Bowl party I questioned how someone that’s not from New England or isn’t a pats fan support the team. Is it to just feel apart of something

0.Can multiple sources of literacy effect a persons over all literacy?

0.Who is mostly at fault parents or educators with the results of one literacy development because gee describe teachers to not help but in Alexander and Brandt they are an impact?

0.Why is readin and writing know to be a contest. Isn’t it about the quality? Why is everything so rushed throughout life?

0.Why does images have such an impact on someone’s experience of literacy? Compared to Alexander why is the image of something so wrapped with literacy

collreadwrit2e